I will lose a piece of my heart and I cannot do anything about it.

The biggest cricketing highlight and talking point of March 2018 should have been how Afghanistan miraculously qualified for 2019 World Cup or the least the collapse of England for 59 against New Zealand. But for those of us who follow this cute little sport, we all know it wasn't. To be honest I don't even know how many of us are actually bothered about the Afghanistan's story anyway.

Steve Smith was definitely performing a level beyond any other current player. But his brain probably fades far too frequently. Whether he got banned or not. Whether he is repentant or not. Whether all guilty have been punished or not are important questions. But will not matter in the long run.

Match Fixing, Ball Tempering, Frequent on and off field misbehaviour by players, Doctoring of pitches, bowling actions, poor umpiring, controversial decision review systems, Disputes between players and respective boards, disputes between boards, disputes with ICC, problems of broadcasting rights, isolation of Pakistan, demise of West Indies and Zimbabwe, race related politics of South Africa, lack of funding in Sri Lankan cricket, batsmen friendly pitches, falling batting techniques, players ending their test careers for lucrative T20 leagues, .... there is an endless list of problems.

It is a resilient game but I don't think any sport can survive incessant assault from so many different angles. Eventually everyone will just lose their trust in it. Even if they don't one will not see for one reason or another, the best players won't compete. 

Making a sport a determinant of one's happiness is silly. But then cricket is essentially what makes an average Indian survive the grit of tedious life. For me personally the happiest and most cherished moments of my life has always been being on the ground with friends or strangers, trying your best to play. At some point life got too busy and all I was left to do was to follow the sport on TV or online.

And thus this piece of my heart will slowly die. And I cannot do anything about it. It is a cliché to say that if something is done now things will turn for good. Unfortunately that emotion has been expressed far too often in the recent past in cricket. It is just an attempt by stake holders to keep the fans together. But the truth is that since the time first cricket controversy broke out, it has been about damage control and finding a scapegoat. The game will just not survive.